Hey Shelley! Please tell our readers all about yourself, your family and your business!
I am a 40 year old mother of 3 children, twin daughters aged 13 whom I currently home educate, my son aged 5 who has autism and will be attending a resource base centre near Salisbury in Wiltshire.
My life from 2004 and the birth of my twins up to this point has been a journey through mental health, experiencing that fully and using those experiences to assist others. Along the way I discover a lot about me, my passions and also delving into the darker side, to bring about necessary healing and change. I find things that have been buried so deep, situations, traumas, people and places I thought I had let go of, start to rise up and out in the most uncomfortable, but strangely transformative way. I discover that all my feelings are valid, and slowly I gave myself permission to feel, regardless of how uncomfortable, bringing awareness and giving my traumas the space to breath and allowing all parts of my energy to return, that subconsciously, I lost through trauma. You see when we feel loss, or have an experience that shakes us to our core, we somehow disconnect at the point of reaction to that experience, and I feel, that is why we have an intense feeling of losing ourselves. However, we are never truly lost, our energy that was once whole, can be rediscovered if you so wish it. A lot has to do with mindset but generally if you set that intention, we can make it so, we can choose.
I trained to become an Angelic Reiki® Practitioner in 2010, and I am passionate about using this healing modality to reach people on a deeper level, especially children, and bringing awareness to your soul, and what you can do to allow YOU fully! It was obvious after learning about Angelic Reiki® and the way in which it can assist for your own spiritual and personal growth, that I needed to apply this to my own life in a big way, so that I can show, that no matter what you face in life, your reaction, and your perception of the situation matters. We don’t realise just how powerful and influential we are until we are faced with life changing and potentially damaging situations.
As humans we always question why me?! Because maybe, just maybe, you are meant for this experience and to use it to make something positive out of it, go forth and speak the experience to show we are never alone! You hear the resounding chants of “Me too!” and suddenly you’re not dealing with your stuff alone, because there are others, many others that can relate on some level. We have a choice to defend that situation and cling to it, or we can cut ties with it and use it for the greater good! I know which one I would choose.
My business is called Ignite The Flame, it focuses on Angelic Reiki® Training and bringing in self help methods to balance your four body system.
Ignite The Flame Workshop is still at birthing stages and I am channelling more content each day for it and am starting to tailor make a similar workshop for those 11-16 years old. This is especially good for those who have an interest in spirituality, and would like to shift old patterns and belief systems, but have never practised meditations or energy healing and this gives a good taste into what that is like.
Experiencing this energy can be life changing, and although I am passionate about sharing this energy with you there is no obligation to train in Angelic Reiki®, and that is the beauty of Ignite the flame, it is there to see how energy healing works and where this could fit into your life, and is it something you would utilise if you became a practitioner yourself...
For me I loved that being able to balance by own child’s energy and working with them on a soul level was the best gift tuning into this energy can give, it opens up an awareness to their feelings on a level you never realised was there. I can assist with parents who know their children are sensitive, report to seeing energy or hearing spirit, there are ways you can help your child understand and accept what they are experiencing.
I have written one book ready for publishing and another is just birthing too. The first book focuses on Children and my journey with my son and the realisation children are here to teach us if we would just allow them too, there are messages contained within this book that parents may be triggered by, and I truly hope so, whatever emotion comes up it is right!
I am no perfect parent, and I realised something about my journey, I didn’t quite understand any of my children, and communication from all angles were being misunderstood, this is simply a lesson for patience, their soul story is unique, and the way in which my parents nurtured me, wasn’t being accepted by my children, and so here’s the thing; the challenge comes when you ask if this is a problem?
Then you start to find other ways to reach them instead however frustrating or uncomfortable that might feel, and in accepting this, you’re also learning from you too without even realising. The way that children no longer learn the same and that actually if you were to adopt a fresh look at children and that maybe, just maybe what they offer goes beyond any diagnosis.
This book is mainly about my personal journey and describes the positives around learning through Autism, it also goes on to describe my relationship with my daughters and our home education journey.
The second book is an account of the way I personally dealt with sexual abuse, and how changing my mindset and looking at ways for facing that wound and healing it, transforming the anger and bringing in forgiveness. That’s not saying what happened was ok, but for you to move forwards with a positive mind set, it is crucial we view our experiences different.
For instance, not allowing it to control your future decisions or clinging so tightly to the experience that it you defend it at every opportunity. Showing that there is room for accepting that it was something that happened, not to me, but for me?
Like I said, use the experience, however soul destroying, don’t let it crush you, because in reality we are much stronger than the experience. You can own how you feel about the experience, but I am here to say it’s so beneficial once you’ve made the choice to release the negative emotions surrounding that trauma, don’t deny those emotions, just allow them but making a conscious decision to change our focus
Would I have had this perception had I not been given the opportunity to discover energy healing? I don’t think I would have been as awake to looking as deeply at life as I do now, that is for sure. The connections I have made since following my pathway has been immensely insightful.
What advice would you give to you 21 year old self?
I think looking back to my earlier life, I would tell my 21 year old self to question everything, and don’t be so quick to make decisions regarding your life and work. Finally, go with your gut instincts, If something feels off, Don’t do it!
Can you give us 3 tips for juggling motherhood, life and business?
So far being the multi tasker of the family has been largely frustrating at times. My advice to myself and everyone else juggling motherhood, life and business is to first, organise!
Second, prioritise and lastly don’t berate yourself if at the end of the day you didn’t achieve it all! Small steps and progress. The process isn’t easy, but if you’re passionate about your work, you’ll make everything work anyway!
Keep it simple in every aspect, less is more and keep those around you that encourage and support your journey.
What is the best thing about being a WAHM?
I love the flexibility of being a work at home mum! My children are my priority and making sure they are thriving in a peaceful and nurturing environment. I still am working on the balance of it all, holding myself accountable when it comes to promises I make to the children, and promises I make to my business. I have found making lists so beneficial, I am also considering delegating some of my admin to a virtual assistant, someone in the know about legalities of being in business. I create the content, and facilitate the workshops and any other stuff I cannot get my head around, I need a soundboard! I personally feel that may help to minimise stress, and free up more time for other areas of my life, that we can so easily neglect.
The best advice anyone ever gave you?
The best advice someone recently gave me was to “Drop the need for perfection and focus on progress!” and “praise yourself for your achievements as you may not get it elsewhere” Also I always try to take my own advice and the best one that has come from me is “Cry the might tears! For they set you free!” This reminds me that when I feel at my most vulnerable I am actually the strongest, I am not keeping that emotion to myself, it’s not stored, it’s being set free, up and out! Behind those tears tell a story, one where we have been challenged, where we’ve been hurt, and it’s ok to express that through tears.
What are you reading right now?
I am reading a book recently published on amazon kindle by someone I have been working with personally for the past year. Channeled inspiration ~ Motivational messages to inspire and uplift by Lilli Badcock. It’s one of those books you can open on the page and it gives you the most perfect message for the day!
How do you practice regular self care?
I choose regular self care in the form of Himalayan salt baths, watching what I eat and plenty of spring water. I also self heal angelic reiki as part of keeping my own energy clear, so I am ready to assist my clients.
I sometimes treat myself to a healing from another practitioner, just because it’s nice for someone else to do the work, as a gift to me, telling myself, “Take a break! You are so worth it!”
Local walks out and about. Giving myself internet free days! I feel journaling is part of my ongoing self care too. I am happiest when I am writing.
I pay attention to my body most during my moon time, when I am feeling especially yuk! I really recommend having a moontime kit. Focus on what soothes you during that time of the month, favourite things, and actually make time for you where possible, not always easy with little ones I know, sometimes I have to involve them, so have their favourite things on hand to chill out with. I choose things like Hot chocolate, or a favourite flavour of fruit tea, a hot water bottle, a nice blanket and good book/comedy film that encourages you to take some rest. I feel that rather than dread my time of the month, it is good to have something to look forward to, giving myself little snippets of rest here and there.
Shelley I thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your wisdom, experiences and insights.
You can find Shelley here via her website
Or drop her an email at firstname.lastname@example.org